How to write a book

Become reasonably famous
Scribble down some sentences composed of half-baked ideas, random clichés, mixed metaphors and thinly veiled analogies
Employ a ghost-writer under the guise of an “editor” (i.e. me)
Get your PR manager to ring the MD of a large publishing concern and tell him that you are writing a book
Sign a contract

Don’t bother wasting your time [...]

Bulgaria, Bulge Area

Bulgaria — home of the Cyrillic alphabet, the Gradeshnitsa Tablets, nine World Heritage sites, and this freak:

Meet Azis, Bulgaria’s foremost gender-bending folk pop singer and failed political candidate, who recently gained notoriety in the gay global arena for his expansion in the wedding tackle department.
Put simply, Azis is a big fat ponce with a huge [...]

Suffer Little Children…